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Are you exhausted? Women today really do feel the weight of the world on their shoulders. Every morning we are greeted with a long list of to-dos: get the kids up and out the door on time, have a meaningful quiet time, put in a full day at the office, spend an hour at the gym, prepare a healthy and delicious meal (organic and locally grown, of course), and make sure the sink sparkles before you go to bed. Oh, and don’t forget to look great and smile while you’re doing it. These are all good things to do, of course. But the bigger problem occurs when we start to feel as if our worth is measured by our to-do lists. And the messages we receive at church, on Facebook, and from the media only perpetuate these unrealistic expectations, creating a relentless cycle of exhaustion. As Elyse Fitzpatrick has traveled this country, she has seen increasing evidence of this weariness epidemic invading our churches and communities. And she has good news for women everywhere: there is hope! God doesn’t judge us by our to-do lists. Instead, He calls us to faith. Free yourself today from the endless stream of bad advice and discover the true rest God offers.
- Sales Rank: #83585 in Books
- Brand: Tyndale House Publishers
- Published on: 2014-09-01
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.10" h x .60" w x 5.50" l, .55 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 240 pages
Review
If you’re in need of good news that relieves and liberates, please read this. And thank-you, Elyse, for reminding me once again that “it is finished.” . . . I keep forgetting. (Tullian Tchividjian, Senior pastor of Coral Ridge Presbyterian Church and author of One Way Love)
From the Back Cover
Are you exhausted?
Women today really do feel the weight of the world on their shoulders. Every morning we are greeted with a long list of to-dos: get the kids up and out the door on time, have a meaningful quiet time, put in a full day of work (whether at home or at the office), spend an hour at the gym, prepare a healthy and delicious meal (organic and locally grown, of course), and make sure the sink sparkles before you go to bed. Oh, and don’t forget to look great and smile while you’re doing it.
These are all good things to do, of course. The problem occurs when we start to feel as if our worth is measured by our to-do lists. And the messages we receive at church, on Facebook, and from the media only perpetuate these unrealistic expectations and create a relentless cycle of exhaustion.
There is hope!
God doesn’t judge us by how successful we are with our to-do lists. Instead, He calls us to faith.
As you join Elyse on this journey, you will learn to free yourself from the endless stream of bad advice and discover the true rest God offers.
About the Author
ELYSE FITZPATRICK has been counseling women since 1989 and is presently a part-time counselor at Grace Church in San Diego. She holds a certificate in biblical counseling from the Christian Counseling and Education Foundation (San Diego) and an M.A. in Biblical Counseling from Trinity Theological Seminary. Elyse is the author of twelve books including "Women Helping Women, Love to Eat, Hate to Eat, Idols of the Heart", and "The Afternoon of Life". She is a member of the National Association of Nouthetic Counseling. A frequent speaker at women's conferences, she has been married for nearly thirty years and has three adult children and two grandchildren. She and her husband, Philip, reside in Escondido, California.
Most helpful customer reviews
20 of 20 people found the following review helpful.
Good News for godly women; it's not you--it's Christ who does the work
By Karen Wilber
Author Elyse Fitzpatrick tackles the mindset that, in order for women to be "godly", they need to fulfill a list of requirements. Some of these pressures include:
* Maintain a well-decorated home
* Make all meals from scratch
* Have well-mannered (and groomed) children
* Always be ready to pursue romance and intimacy with her husband
* Read the Bible and pray every day--without fail
Through well meaning, but bad advice, many women have been led to believe that they must lead a perfect life in order to please God. This only sets them up for failure and disappointment. Add in picture perfect status updates on Facebook and Instagram and stir in a big dose of Pinterest and it can seem like everyone has it together, but you.
The Good News is that salvation does not come from our own hands, but through the atoning work of Jesus Christ. Fitzpatrick uses Scripture to show that a woman's highest calling is to believe. She might enjoy cooking or crafting, only eat organic, or never drink alcohol, but she should do these things from joy or conscience, not because she feel these activities will make her more holy.
Some of the issues addressed in this book are:
*the misapplication of Scripture (i.e.,the Proverbs 31 woman)
*Karma-like Christianity which leads us to believe that good behavior = reward
*the need to feel OK and accepted by God
*The problem with "If X makes God happy, then X+Y must make Him really happy"
*the balance between Law and Grace
*the delusion of self-perfection
*how to evaluate our beliefs, rules, lists, and activities to see if we're complying in order to be saved
Fitzpatrick has a wonderful, warm style of writing which comes from her background in counseling. She backs up her words with Scripture and with input from other women who've experienced the pressures of unnecessary burdens. There are end of chapter questions which make this ideal for a women's book study group.
I received a copy of this book from the Tyndale Blog Network in return for an honest review.
16 of 17 people found the following review helpful.
What a surprise!
By daylilyoverflow
I’ll be honest and say that I picked this book because I expected not to like it. It seemed like good fodder for a writer just coming to terms with a little bit of feminism.
Books written specifically for women can be hard to stomach.
But I was surprised with this one.
Good News for Weary Women was gracefully written and gracefully delivered.
And by ‘gracefully’ I mean ‘as if filled with grace’ not ‘as if flitting lightly through a field of daisies’.
Grace filled pages.
In this book, Elyse M. Fitzpatrick, offers us hope and freedom from the expectations of the world as she writes about the completely finished work of Christ, our place in the salvation story, and our work in His creation. Instead of searching for acceptance and peace by doing more and being better, we can rest and have faith that God doesn’t need (or require) our many and small efforts. Fitzpatrick carefully outlines the gospel and exactly what it means for us, as women in a world of too much to do, too many opinions, and too many expectations, to be gifted a place of acceptance in God’s eyes. We can stop trying to measure up and just rest.
As I said before I picked this book up expecting not like it.
And the reason showed up in the first chapter, but it wasn’t quite as bad as I was expecting. In the chapter, called “How did we end up here?”, Elyse tackles the topic of feminism. She says that feminism caused the rise of the “Biblical Womanhood” movement with all its corresponding rules and expectations. Which is true. Technically speaking that particular response wouldn’t have been triggered without feminism, but you also have to think where we’d be without feminism and what the subsequent rules those events would have triggered. I think that whatever events transpired we would end up worn out, overworked, and trying too hard. It’s just how sin is working in this world.
You can’t blame the world’s problems on one movement or another. Well, you can try. But that’s not the root of the problem.
And here’s where the book surprised me and addressed the other side:
“The truth is that both radical feminism — lies sold go women in the name of equality — and radical femininity — lies sold to women in the name of Christianity — have harmed women and children. But while Christians have been quick to engage in conversations about the repercussions of misguided feminism, there hasn’t been much acknowledgment of the way women are harmed when they are force-fed rules that go beyond Scripture — rules that are products of a particular culture rather than gospel.”
– Elyse M. Fitzpatrick in Good News for Weary Women: Escaping the Bondage of To-Do Lists, Steps, and Bad Advice
And that is when I started to give the book more grace and actually hear the words more easily. Sure, there are points we disagree on, but agreeing that neither extreme is good is an excellent place to converse and continue to agree on more things.
I also really appreciated that Fitzpatrick is big on theology. I liked seeing themes from The Normal Christian Life come up as she expounded on the work of Jesus dying on the cross and the Gospel message.
The really good part of this book was the grace. I think that for most women it would have been a bit more mind blowing, but for me it seemed familiar and right, but still freeing, since I have been inundating myself with grace giving books the last few years.
Overall, I ended up feeling like I can wholeheartedly stand behind most of what this wise lady had to say. I’d recommend this book for women who feel like they just have too much to do and can’t say no without risking their credibility as a Christian.
(Though I would put a disclaimer in for people who lean towards feminism… or even towards fundamentalism.. : both these takes on women take a harsh critique so only read it if you can hear words you disagree with and then keep listening without shutting down. But that is honestly only a small part of this book and Elyse deals with both sides so circumspectly that only the Gospel comes out on top. So a warning. But then not.)
—-
I received a complimentary copy of this book from Tyndale House for review purposes and all opinions are my own.
6 of 6 people found the following review helpful.
For the Stressed out Mom...Give Yourself Grace
By momma mia
Every woman knows that there are certain societal pressures put on her from "them". (Who exactly "they" are, we may never know.) Things like: "you must prepare all your family's meals from scratch using only organic ingredients." Or: "You must always be perfectly groomed with make-up done and wearing attractive clothing to keep your husband's eye from wandering." Or: "Your house must always look like something from a Pottery Barn catalog, spotless and smelling like fresh linen." As a result, we feel like we must do it all, but quickly become disillusioned when we realize we can't do it all. So, what are we, women who can barely keep their heads above water in dealing with the tasks of life, to do?
This book was a breath of fresh air. Elyse basically says that these expectations do little more than make us feel worthless. They do not encourage us, and take our eyes away from what really matters. What God wants from us. The one good work God wants us from us is to believe in Him. Nowhere in the Bible does it say, "you're only a good Christian girl if you make all your cleaning supplies from scratch and wake up at 5am to make fresh bread before your family awakens."
The most important thing we can do for our children is to model a strong relationship with the Lord for them, and to make them feel safe and loved. Elyse argues that impossible expectations put us on edge, and keep us from fulfilling those most important things. (How many times have I told my kids I couldn't play because I had to clean, or yelled at them for making a mess on my clean floors? How can I model grace when I'm too busy focused on outward appearances?)
This book really encouraged me, and it made me feel better about some of the judgmental comments I've received in my parenting journey. It reminded me that the opinion that matters most is from God, and we remember what He said about Mary and Martha. Obviously, tasks need to be done, and the house does need to be cleaned, and food does need to be served, but sometimes the act of doing these tasks becomes more important than the outcome. (Such as, "I did all these things because I'm Supermom and I'm awesome.", not "I did all these things so I could show my family how much I love them.) The main point? Give yourself grace, and put more time into the relationships in your life than the to-do lists.
As a con, I think this book was a bit repetitive, and could have been a blog series instead of a book, but I did like the overall message, and have been telling my family and friends about it.
Thank you to Tyndale Publishers for a free copy of this book in exchange for my honest and unbiased review.
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