Download Beyond Ordinary: When a Good Marriage Just Isn't Good Enough, by Justin Davis, Trisha Davis
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Beyond Ordinary: When a Good Marriage Just Isn't Good Enough, by Justin Davis, Trisha Davis
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How safe is your marriage? The answer may surprise you. The biggest threat to any marriage isn’t infidelity or miscommunication. The greatest enemy is ordinary. Ordinary marriages lose hope. Ordinary marriages lack vision. Ordinary marriages give in to compromise. Ordinary is the belief that this is as good as it will ever get. And when we begin to settle for ordinary, it’s easy to move from “I do” to “I’m done.”
Justin and Trisha Davis know just how dangerous ordinary can be. In this beautifully written book, Justin and Trisha take us inside the slow fade that occurred in their own marriage—each telling the story from their own perspective. Together, they reveal the mistakes they made, the work they avoided, the thoughts and feelings that led to an affair and near divorce, and finally, the heart-change that had to occur in both of them before they could experience the hope, healing, and restoration of a truly extraordinary marriage.
- Sales Rank: #56367 in Books
- Brand: Tyndale House Publishers
- Published on: 2013-01-01
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.20" h x .70" w x 5.50" l, .65 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 256 pages
Review
Justin and Trisha share their story with transparency and courage. They provide practical and powerful teaching that is applicable to every couple - newlywed or veteran. This resource will greatly strengthen your marriage. I can say that honestly, because it's done it for mine.
-Natalie Grant, 5-Time CMA Female Vocalist of the Year
My favorite thing about this book is that it's not a book on how to have a perfect marriage. It's a book about having a real marriage. And the difference between those two things is monumental. Honest, insightful and helpful, this is an awesome resource.
-Jon Acuff, Wall Street Journal Bestselling Author of Quitter and Stuff Christians Like
Everyone likes a good love story. But many of us spend our lives slightly disappointed in the love story we're trying to live. Beyond Ordinary is what you've been looking for if you want to ignite your relationship to become what God intended you to have.
-Lysa TerKeurst, New York Times bestselling author and president of Proverbs 31 Ministries
What a moving and inspiring testimony! Justin and Trisha Davis are powerful examples of God's ability to breathe new life into a marriage that seems to have reached the end. Beyond Ordinary encourages every couple to believe that their relationship can become truly extraordinary.
-Jim Daly, President - Focus on the Family
In this book of searing honesty, Justin and Trisha remind us that marraige, like any other good and beautiful thing, is worth fighting for, and cannot be won and kept without it. In their story you will find your story, or you will find hope for a story that needs healing in its own way.
-John Ortberg, Senior Pastor, Menlo Park Presbyterian Church
Justin and Trisha show you what it takes...to have an incredible marriage, life, and faith. Reading this book just might save you a few scars, but be prepared: it will also call you out of complacency and into something extraordinary.
-Jeff Goins, author, Wrecked: When a Broken World Slams into Your Comfortable Life
Justin and Trisha share a story of struggle and hope as they pull back the curtain on a tragic marriage that turned triumphant. I am so thankful that they wrote this book and believe it will help people stop fighting in their marriage and actually begin fighting for it.
-Perry Noble, Senior Pastor, NewSpring Church
Justin and Trisha Davis have given us a profound gift of transparency and practical hope in Beyond Ordinary. Through their own journey they point the way to better relationships and healing for all of us, whether we are struggling or striving.
-Jud Wilhite, author of Torn, Senior Pastor of Central Christian Church Las Vegas
Review
Everyone likes a good love story. But many of us spend our lives slightly disappointed in the love story we’re trying to live. Beyond Ordinary is what you’ve been looking for if you want to ignite your relationship to become what God intended for you to have. (Lysa Terkeurst—New York Times bestselling author; President of Proverbs 31 Ministries)
In this book of searing honesty, Justin & Trisha remind us that marriage, like any other good and beautiful thing, is worth fighting for. In their story you will find your story, or you will find hope for a story that needs healing in its own way. (John Ortberg— Senior Pastor at Menlo Park Presbyterian Church; author of The Me I Want to Be)
From the Back Cover
This is not an ordinary marriage book.
Justin & Trisha Davis know all too well the dangers of settling for an ordinary marriage. Their own failure to recognize the warning signs almost resulted in the end of their marriage, their family, and their ministry. Now, with disarming transparency, they give readers a rare glimpse into the slow fade that eventually led to the near destruction of everything they held dear.
Using a compelling “he said, she said” approach, Justin and Trisha share two sides of the same story, exposing the seemingly insignificant comments and decisions couples make every day that can dramatically alter the course of a marriage. They also share the invaluable lessons they learned that helped them restore their relationship and transform their ordinary marriage into an extraordinary one!
It’s your marriage.
Why would you settle for anything less?
Most helpful customer reviews
39 of 41 people found the following review helpful.
Not your run of the mill marriage book
By Matt Appling
I'll be honest. I don't get into marriage books. Most of them are filled with somewhat "ivory tower" advice about how to have a great marriage (inevitably with the author's marriage as the model.)
This is not one of those marriage books. This is a "he said/she said memoir," and it really is written back and forth between Justin and Trisha, as if you are eavesdropping on their family therapy sessions. This is a book about rescuing a marriage from the brink. It's for couples who may have had some lofty pre-marital counseling, but now find themselves in desperate need some "post-marital" counseling. Justin and Trisha are brutally, beautifully, tragically honest about their marriage, and they are therefore more credible. If their marriage can me saved, so can yours.
45 of 50 people found the following review helpful.
Beyond Ordinary is Beyond Ordinary
By Jared Yaple
A few years ago my wife and I led a group of couples through a reading of "Sacred Marriage," by Gary Thomas. I would say it is the best overall book on Christian marriage available (yeah...I know...the Bible is better).
But here's the deal...
In that group there was a couple who were not getting along. On some nights the guys and gals would split up, and my wife and I (probably everyone) noticed how mean these two were towards each other. The long and short of it is that they split up within 12 months.
So what the heck does this have to do with "Beyond the Ordinary?"
Simple, when you read Trisha and Justin's book you are not let off via the "theoretical/philosophical hook." You can't just sit there and say to yourself, "Well that's the right theory. Of course the author can put down the right answers because his marriage is great. His examples are Mickey Mouse. He doesn't understand the s*** that we go through."
Why? Because on every page you get to see the s*** that Trisha and Justin went through (get over the cuss word by the way...read the book...they go through s***).
And when they unpack their story, you are left bare. You are left without a course for avoidance. You are left in a place where the only thing you can do is receive their words of wisdom.
I wish I could've offered that couple "Beyond Ordinary." I wish I could've smacked the husband upside the head with it, or at least read it with him.
Bottom Line:
If your Christian marriage is going through hell, and you need to learn from folks who have lived through hell and survived, read "Beyond Ordinary."
63 of 77 people found the following review helpful.
Do Not Recommend
By i blog 4 books
I want to preface my review by saying that I understand that Justin and Trisha Davis (the authors) are real people. I think it shows great courage to write a book sharing the darkest, ugliest parts of your life in the hopes that God would be glorified through your testimony and that others might be helped.
Unfortunately, though, I didn't feel that the book was executed well. First, let me explain the layout of the book. The book is divided into twelve chapters. Each chapter begins with Justin and Trisha telling a little about their story--how they met, some about their dating life, their young marriage, having children, struggles in their marriage, the issues that nearly caused their marriage to crumble, and a bit about how they were able to overcome those problems. The "story" alternates between the two of them, so you get both perspectives. This section reads like a blog or a conversation. Then the last half to two-thirds of the chapter is "teaching" on marriage and topics geared toward helping couples improve their marriage. This section reads very much like a sermon.
Now, here's what I liked about the book. It was well-written, technically speaking. Everything made sense and was well-edited. I also liked the back-and-forth style of the first part of each chapter, allowing both Justin and Trisha to tell their story in their own words.
From the beginning, I found it extremely difficult to like Justin and Trisha--as they chose to portray themselves through the first section of each chapter. Justin especially seemed unlikable, and I wondered all along why "Team Justin" felt so strongly that Trisha and Justin should date and marry.
Throughout the book, Justin told story after story of awful things he said and did to Trisha and their children. There were only two instances that I can recall that he prefaced it by saying he was sorry or ashamed or something similar. Since this is not a journal but is written from the perspective of having repented of these sins, I wished he would have shown that repentance throughout the book. I needed him to reiterate over and over that he regretted these things, that it was painful to admit them, that it was embarrassing and shameful to have to share with the world what he had done.
Similarly, as Trisha shared mistakes that she made in their marriage, she confessed to what she did but I didn't feel her sorrow, grief, or repentance over these actions and words. (Side note: Justin and Trisha most likely are extremely remorseful and repentant of the actions that took place in their marriage, but it doesn't come through in how they tell their story in this book.) And with both Justin and Trisha, it seemed that blame was the name of the game--obviously in the past, but it felt like they were still blaming each other, other people, and their circumstances at the end of the book without taking personal responsibility for what happened. With all of this presented as the background, it made it difficult to view the "sermon" portions of the chapters as something that I should listen to and put into practice.
In regards to the content of the book, I left the book feeling like I needed more of the "after" part of their story. The build up to the "final straw" and the chapters dealing with the initial response was so drawn out and had me feeling so negative towards marriage in general and Justin and Trisha in particular that I needed more of the "redemption" part of their story. I wanted to know how in the world they managed to save their marriage after ten chapters of such tragedy. I wanted to know how they are doing now. How is their marriage different now than when they first got married or when they first started trying to make things right? What steps are they taking to prevent another catastrophe? What accountability is in place for both of them to keep things moving in the right direction? Some fairly serious things happened during the first ten years of their marriage, and the "fix" was simply glossed over. The last few chapters were long on sermon and short on personal account, which contributed to this feeling of needing more.
My final problem was with the overall tone of the book. I read Christian books--both fiction and non-fiction--because I want to read books that leave me feeling hopeful. On a whole, I didn't feel that this book was hopeful and inspiring. Parts of it were very negative and hopeless.
I really struggled while writing this review. These are real people who are sharing their personal story. I never want to appear to criticize someone's story because it's just that--their story--and everyone's story is worth telling. My goal was to critique the telling of the story without diminishing or attacking this couple or how God has worked in and through them. I hope I have succeeded in doing so.
With that said, I would not recommend this book. I believe other books would be more helpful to couples in crisis and portray an overall more hopeful picture of how God can redeem anything for our good and His glory. [1 star]
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